ch-check!

whenever j and i finish any big task in life, i like to write a big imaginary check mark in the air and say, “ch-check!” and today’s accomplishment is… that we DID get the placement agency paperwork to the post office today!  yay!  the only minor hiccup was that for some reason, when i opened the packages of photos of the inside of our house, only three of the nine were there, so i had to call walgreen’s and ask them to please reprint the photos and then go back again to get them.  but hiccups, schmiccups, that hoop has been jumped and now i can relax a little because our other hoops are less time sensitive.

tonight we attended our very first parenting/adoption class.  according to the state of wisconsin, we are required to complete 18 hours of education before we can be approved as adoptive parents.  This evening’s class was our first three hours and dealt with the topic of Positive Parenting.  I found it to be a great class.  First of all, it was the first time we were thrown in with a group of other adopting couples which was interesting, occasionally slightly awkward, but considering that we were complete strangers, I felt like we actually opened up pretty quickly as a group, willing to joke around with each other and give quickie summaries of our respective adoption journeys.  It helped that there were one or two very outgoing and friendly members of the group (note to self:  don’t be afraid to BE that outgoing person if necessary).  Second of all, the class topic was one I found very useful.  Basically, she talked about the difference between punishment and discipline (in short, punishment is punitive, discipline can be more instructive and healthy) and then gave us general philosophies to keep in mind and some practical applications and ways to follow her guidelines with our future children.  I felt very encouraged when I realized that most of the techniques she mentioned I had already been seeing in action in my friends’ families and in families that I see at the library and admire.  These aren’t brand new ideas for me.  I’m sure they’re also not all second-nature to me yet, but …. well, it’s sort of like when I started working as a children’s librarian and couldn’t remember ANY kids songs or fingerplays other than the Itsy Bitsy Spider and the Wheels on the Bus.  The longer I worked in the field, I kept discovering more rhymes–some new to me, others that ring bells of memory for me.  I gained new knowledge and was reminded of old, buried knowledge.  In the same way, when adoption forms ask me to talk about my views on parenting and discipline, I”m really at a loss to put it all into words, but I DO “know” the skills–redirecting, offering choices, understanding that kids behave the way they do because of different developmental stages or because they’re tired or hungry or getting sick–I just had to be reminded that I knew them.  Now if I could only figure out how to fit everything into three lines….